i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
