theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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