i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
