she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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