her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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