so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
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