Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
