Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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