ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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