ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
