And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
