I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
