what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
