Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
