I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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