Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
