Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
