Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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