Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
