Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
