I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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