32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
this hospital has no fireball
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
