you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
