I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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