i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
