did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize