yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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