Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
