I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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