then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
