I'll bet she douches with gravy.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize