I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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