Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize