I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize