How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
