There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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