watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
