Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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