Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
