Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
