what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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