I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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