That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
