I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
