But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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