walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
