belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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