oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Let's get the cat blown out
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
