I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
