i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
