She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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