i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
